sorry I've been gone for a while, for anybody who actually cares. Actually, I take back my apology. You all smell funny anyway.
---
Comfort is a strange sensation.
telling you everything is ok.
you should be happy with what you've got,
there is no need
to look at the man behind the curtain
and wonder
well,
why does he get to pull the drawstrings?
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
the end of the world
Earlier today I gave my brother a ride to some appointment in downtown. He needed to go meet with somebody to discuss getting some extra financial aid to buy art supplies or something. I don't really know, I was just giving him a ride.
I dropped him off and parked further down the road. No sense in driving all the way home if I was going to have to go pick him up in an hour or half an hour. I stole some change from the cup holder and paid the parking meter. Thirty eight minutes for eighty cents.
I decided I would walk around the streets of the city for a bit, take in the scenery. I walked around the block to a Dunkin Donuts. I bought a large caramel iced coffee. It was pretty good.
As a left, I was approached by a man. He was not quite elderly, but past middle-aged. His hair was gray and wispy. Strapped over him, was a sign. On the front it had a picture of two roads intersecting in the shape of a cross, consumed by flame. In big letters, white as innocence, it read "Heaven or Hell?"
He tried to hand me a pamphlet. "No thanks." I took a sip of my iced coffee and kept strolling, my flip-flops slapping the concrete with every step.
"You can never be too certain you know!"
I turned around, but kept walking away from him. "I'm pretty sure on this one, thanks."
"So you think."
I'll admit, my curiosity was sparked. How could he believe that the world was coming to an end? Especially if you could never be too certain. I decided to ask.
"Are you so certain that the world will end, that you are willing to stand on the corner wearing a sign handing out pamphlets?"
"Well, I'm not," he said with a grin, "but if the world does end, and we are judged before God, I am glad to have repented."
"And if I have not sinned?"
"Well then, you have nothing to worry about, but nobody lives a pure life."
I smiled, and walked away.
I dropped him off and parked further down the road. No sense in driving all the way home if I was going to have to go pick him up in an hour or half an hour. I stole some change from the cup holder and paid the parking meter. Thirty eight minutes for eighty cents.
I decided I would walk around the streets of the city for a bit, take in the scenery. I walked around the block to a Dunkin Donuts. I bought a large caramel iced coffee. It was pretty good.
As a left, I was approached by a man. He was not quite elderly, but past middle-aged. His hair was gray and wispy. Strapped over him, was a sign. On the front it had a picture of two roads intersecting in the shape of a cross, consumed by flame. In big letters, white as innocence, it read "Heaven or Hell?"
He tried to hand me a pamphlet. "No thanks." I took a sip of my iced coffee and kept strolling, my flip-flops slapping the concrete with every step.
"You can never be too certain you know!"
I turned around, but kept walking away from him. "I'm pretty sure on this one, thanks."
"So you think."
I'll admit, my curiosity was sparked. How could he believe that the world was coming to an end? Especially if you could never be too certain. I decided to ask.
"Are you so certain that the world will end, that you are willing to stand on the corner wearing a sign handing out pamphlets?"
"Well, I'm not," he said with a grin, "but if the world does end, and we are judged before God, I am glad to have repented."
"And if I have not sinned?"
"Well then, you have nothing to worry about, but nobody lives a pure life."
I smiled, and walked away.
Monday, June 13, 2011
a good deed
"Hey dad."
I hadn't seen my dad in a while. He didn't live that far away, but we didn't have that much money, so getting there was still tough. It was about a forty minute drive.
"Hey Jack!"
We went for a walk along the canal. Idle chitchat mostly, pointing out any interesting animal I saw, discussing how he's been doing. He works at a cable factory, doing payroll or something. He was asked recently to put up a bunch of old cables that they stop making now on eBay to be sold. Instead, he decided to buy the cables all at once for himself so he could sell them for a profit later. I don't think he'll actually make any money doing this.
"See that girl?" he said to me. A plump woman just walked by us, with a fluffy white dog trotting ahead of her.
"Yea? what about her?"
"I saved her. But now she doesn't even say hello when I walk by."
"You saved her?"
"Well, her got locked out of her car up ahead over here a couple weeks ago. She asked me if I could help her, so I walked home and got a coat hanger and helped her jimmy her door open."
"That was nice of you."
"Yea, but she still doesn't say hello. She was nice when she needed something, but not now. Now I'm just some old guy who happens to walk on the same path as her. I'm nobody. It's like what I did doesn't even matter."
"But dad, you didn't say hi to her either."
I hadn't seen my dad in a while. He didn't live that far away, but we didn't have that much money, so getting there was still tough. It was about a forty minute drive.
"Hey Jack!"
We went for a walk along the canal. Idle chitchat mostly, pointing out any interesting animal I saw, discussing how he's been doing. He works at a cable factory, doing payroll or something. He was asked recently to put up a bunch of old cables that they stop making now on eBay to be sold. Instead, he decided to buy the cables all at once for himself so he could sell them for a profit later. I don't think he'll actually make any money doing this.
"See that girl?" he said to me. A plump woman just walked by us, with a fluffy white dog trotting ahead of her.
"Yea? what about her?"
"I saved her. But now she doesn't even say hello when I walk by."
"You saved her?"
"Well, her got locked out of her car up ahead over here a couple weeks ago. She asked me if I could help her, so I walked home and got a coat hanger and helped her jimmy her door open."
"That was nice of you."
"Yea, but she still doesn't say hello. She was nice when she needed something, but not now. Now I'm just some old guy who happens to walk on the same path as her. I'm nobody. It's like what I did doesn't even matter."
"But dad, you didn't say hi to her either."
Sunday, June 12, 2011
reflections
Last night I slept over at a friends house. I woke up this morning to the sound of the rain slamming against the stones in the back yard. I looked to my left to see another one of my friends lying face down on the floor. I snickered.
I put my shoes on, grabbed my backpack and headed for the door. I set my backpack down to the right of the door and went outside. There was an awning protecting me from the rain just outside the door, but beyond that I would be unprotected. I started jogging.
I had parked my car just down the street; the drive way was already full when I showed up. I got in my car and started it. I adjusted my mirrors, and turned my music it on. Have I told ya, have I told ya? You could really get it on yea you could really get it on.
I drove my car to his place again, ran inside and grabbed my backpack, and then left. Driving, the road was wet. You could see the mist being kicked up from your tires, creating clouds of fog in the air behind you. My windshield wipers were at the highest setting, water being flicked off either side of the window. My elbow rested on the console, but kept slipping off. I guess I was still tired.
When I got home, there was a red car in my drive way. It was slightly rusted. I pulled my car up and parked next to it. I got out and walked by it as I walked around the front of my car. It must be one of my sister's friends. They had fast food garbage in the front seat.
I went inside and took my shoes off. I walked down the hall to the kitchen, but wait. We have a mirror hanging on the wall there. I walked by it, but my reflection didn't. I stopped. Turning around, I faced the mirror. My reflection was there, staring back at me. I looked into my eyes, there was something peculiar there. I waved. Four seconds later, my reflection waved back.
I put my shoes on, grabbed my backpack and headed for the door. I set my backpack down to the right of the door and went outside. There was an awning protecting me from the rain just outside the door, but beyond that I would be unprotected. I started jogging.
I had parked my car just down the street; the drive way was already full when I showed up. I got in my car and started it. I adjusted my mirrors, and turned my music it on. Have I told ya, have I told ya? You could really get it on yea you could really get it on.
I drove my car to his place again, ran inside and grabbed my backpack, and then left. Driving, the road was wet. You could see the mist being kicked up from your tires, creating clouds of fog in the air behind you. My windshield wipers were at the highest setting, water being flicked off either side of the window. My elbow rested on the console, but kept slipping off. I guess I was still tired.
When I got home, there was a red car in my drive way. It was slightly rusted. I pulled my car up and parked next to it. I got out and walked by it as I walked around the front of my car. It must be one of my sister's friends. They had fast food garbage in the front seat.
I went inside and took my shoes off. I walked down the hall to the kitchen, but wait. We have a mirror hanging on the wall there. I walked by it, but my reflection didn't. I stopped. Turning around, I faced the mirror. My reflection was there, staring back at me. I looked into my eyes, there was something peculiar there. I waved. Four seconds later, my reflection waved back.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
a short story
So today I wrote a short story. It was about this guy who had the amazing ability to go back and forth through time, changing whatever he pleased. He did this for a while, generally living a linear life but going back and changing things occasionally, whenever he made a mistake or didn't like something. He worked hard to create his perfect little world, and the work was paying off. After a while it seemed like the world he had created was wonderful, so he stopped going back and forth through time and just sort of went along with the grove of it. After a while, things started going poorly for my protagonist, and he didn't like how things were turning out. He ended up committing suicide because of it. After I wrote this part, I decided I didn't like how my story had turned out, so I threw it away.
Friday, June 10, 2011
introducing maggie the cow
This is the first part of the story of Maggie the cow. Hope you like it.
~~~
We lived in an old refurbished farm house when I first met Maggie. The farm a ways down the road had lit up in a blaze that could be seen for miles around. The old man who lived there and his wife ended up staying with some relatives down in the city while it was rebuilt. They gave the majority of their animals to the care of another farmer who lived not too far away, but left one dairy cow with us to keep safe. Her name was Maggie.
We kept Maggie in the garage, which had been a small horse stable before the farm was refurbished. I remember that night; my dad came into my room and asked me if I would like to meet Maggie. I giggled, "Sure, daddy!"
My father took me by my hand. My other one was occupied by the arm of a teddy bear named Berry. Berry had on a stars and moon nightcap and his nose was slightly twisted from the mouth of my dog, Boo. We crept down the stairs to the garage and went inside.
"This is Maggie."
Before me was a strange creature. It was taller than me, but only by a few inches. It had a funny brown tuff of hair on its head that was longer than the hair, that covered its body everywhere else. She stood awkwardly, as if her legs did not have enough muscle to completely support her; she swayed slightly to the side.
"Hello, Maggie!"
My father put pressure on my back with his hand, not pushing me but slightly urging me towards the cow. I took a step forward. Suddenly I fell back. The cow had licked my face. I turned, horror-struck to my dad. I don't think I've ever seen him sport a bigger grin.
"Maggie licked me!"
"She likes you!"
~~~
We lived in an old refurbished farm house when I first met Maggie. The farm a ways down the road had lit up in a blaze that could be seen for miles around. The old man who lived there and his wife ended up staying with some relatives down in the city while it was rebuilt. They gave the majority of their animals to the care of another farmer who lived not too far away, but left one dairy cow with us to keep safe. Her name was Maggie.
We kept Maggie in the garage, which had been a small horse stable before the farm was refurbished. I remember that night; my dad came into my room and asked me if I would like to meet Maggie. I giggled, "Sure, daddy!"
My father took me by my hand. My other one was occupied by the arm of a teddy bear named Berry. Berry had on a stars and moon nightcap and his nose was slightly twisted from the mouth of my dog, Boo. We crept down the stairs to the garage and went inside.
"This is Maggie."
Before me was a strange creature. It was taller than me, but only by a few inches. It had a funny brown tuff of hair on its head that was longer than the hair, that covered its body everywhere else. She stood awkwardly, as if her legs did not have enough muscle to completely support her; she swayed slightly to the side.
"Hello, Maggie!"
My father put pressure on my back with his hand, not pushing me but slightly urging me towards the cow. I took a step forward. Suddenly I fell back. The cow had licked my face. I turned, horror-struck to my dad. I don't think I've ever seen him sport a bigger grin.
"Maggie licked me!"
"She likes you!"
Thursday, June 9, 2011
the girl with the red hair
A beep came over my headset.
“Hello, can I take your order please?”
“Hi, how are you?”
I didn’t respond. She wasn’t really asking me. That’s just what people say instinctively, and then they follow it up by going directly into their order. There was a pause; she wasn’t saying anything. Three seconds.
“I’m good, how are you? And what can I get for you today?”
“Good. Could I get an iced latte?”
“Would you like a flavor for that?”
“Caramel please.”
“Can I get anything else for you?”
“Hello, can I take your order please?”
“Hi, how are you?”
I didn’t respond. She wasn’t really asking me. That’s just what people say instinctively, and then they follow it up by going directly into their order. There was a pause; she wasn’t saying anything. Three seconds.
“I’m good, how are you? And what can I get for you today?”
“Good. Could I get an iced latte?”
“Would you like a flavor for that?”
“Caramel please.”
“Can I get anything else for you?”
Silence. I feel like this is the typical response by most people. They are done with their order so they lose interest in the order. They don’t have enough motivation to bother saying something. I don’t like this though. Sometimes I like to pretend that everybody just nods when I get to that part. I’m sure some people do that, quite frequently actually. But her silence wasn’t permanent.
“Yea, that will be all, thank you!”
“three-oh-one to your first window please.”
When she got to my window she was all smiles. I opened my window to the ninety plus degree weather, and smiled back.
“three-oh-one please.”
She handed me the money. She had short red hair. It was the shade of red that girls in high school would try to dye their hair when they felt like being pretty; but I think it was natural. It was pretty.
I counted out her change and opened my window again to hand it to her. I think I was humming an ABBA song. Money money money had been stuck in my head all day.
“Seven dollars is your change. Have a great day!”
“Thanks! Hey, sorry…” I was in the process of quickly sliding the drive-thru window shut again, returning to taking the next car’s order. My hand pressed against the glass and stopped it from closing.
“Yea? What can I do for you?”
“What’s your name?”
“It’s Jack.”
“Thanks Jake, you said Jake right?” She seemed flustered. She started looking around her car for something.
“No, Jack. I’m Jack.” I smiled at her. Her eyes seemed to move under her glasses.
A beep came over my headset.
“Hello, can I take your order please?”
“Yea, can I get three cheeseburgers, a large coke…”
I turned and started hitting the correct buttons on my monitor. It only took about eight seconds; they knew exactly what they wanted, and did not waste anytime with idle chitchat.
Looking back out the window, the girl with the red hair was gone.
“Yea, that will be all, thank you!”
“three-oh-one to your first window please.”
When she got to my window she was all smiles. I opened my window to the ninety plus degree weather, and smiled back.
“three-oh-one please.”
She handed me the money. She had short red hair. It was the shade of red that girls in high school would try to dye their hair when they felt like being pretty; but I think it was natural. It was pretty.
I counted out her change and opened my window again to hand it to her. I think I was humming an ABBA song. Money money money had been stuck in my head all day.
“Seven dollars is your change. Have a great day!”
“Thanks! Hey, sorry…” I was in the process of quickly sliding the drive-thru window shut again, returning to taking the next car’s order. My hand pressed against the glass and stopped it from closing.
“Yea? What can I do for you?”
“What’s your name?”
“It’s Jack.”
“Thanks Jake, you said Jake right?” She seemed flustered. She started looking around her car for something.
“No, Jack. I’m Jack.” I smiled at her. Her eyes seemed to move under her glasses.
A beep came over my headset.
“Hello, can I take your order please?”
“Yea, can I get three cheeseburgers, a large coke…”
I turned and started hitting the correct buttons on my monitor. It only took about eight seconds; they knew exactly what they wanted, and did not waste anytime with idle chitchat.
Looking back out the window, the girl with the red hair was gone.
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